Sadie Robertson is known for being an open book with her fans but there was one struggle the reality star hid from everyone in her life.
“At least five times a day, I would wrap my hands around my thighs, making sure they hadn’t grown beyond what I could reach. I knew each little calorie that was in every bite of food I took. I talked about food all of the time. I hid behind the talk, and I actually hid behind encouraging others,” Robertson wrote of her eating disorder on her blog “Live Original.”
“It was dark. It was ugly. It was insanely difficult. It was done in secret. It was hidden,” Robertson wrote. “I did not even tell my own mother until recently. I thought I had everything under control.”
The 20-year-old said she decided to finally reveal her eating disorder in order to help her fans who might be dealing with the same issue.
“I don’t want to be the photo-shopped girl behind the window or the screen – giving you another impossible image to compare yourself to,” she wrote adding those same images were the ones that sent her over the edge.
“My self-worth was demolished, and I began to lose sight of my true identity,” she shared.
Robertson said her body image issues began after she was on “Dancing With the Stars” in 2014.
She wrote she would look in the mirror and her “thoughts instantly went to the imperfections. The blemishes. The flaws.”
The Louisiana native said she helped others through similar issues while she was dealing with her own issues but refused to listen to her own advice.
Eventually, the “Duck Dynasty” star turned to God and asked for help.
“The day I prayed for the Lord to enlighten my eyes to see His standard of beauty, is the day my whole life changed,” she said. “Do these old thoughts come back from time to time? Absolutely, but it is my job to take authority over them.”
You can find Sasha Savitsky on Twitter @SashaFB.